i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
