Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
