fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
