I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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