it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
We talked him into tasing himself.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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