I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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