I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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