HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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