It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
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