We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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