I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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