The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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