Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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