Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
