But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she told me i tasted like america
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We left the knife in your bed.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
