The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
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Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
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We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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