Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize