D3 body, D1 cock
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize