And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Dicks are not precious.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
