Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize