Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
She's JV to your varsity
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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