Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
