I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
