Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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