Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I faked an abortion last night.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
