Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
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