he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize