gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
