i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize
