I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize