He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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