worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
