After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
