I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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