They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize