Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize