Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
