Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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