dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
