How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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