I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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