I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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