I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
