i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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