Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize