Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
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She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
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one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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