no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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