Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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