Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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