I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
