North Korea, Best Korea!
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize